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  #1  
Old March 16th, 2010, 03:43 PM
Yuridia Neuhaus Yuridia Neuhaus is offline
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Default it bothers me..

i know this is not 'my relationship' but it bothers me that my close friend is in an unhealthy relationship. her boyfriend doesn't want to go to school.. or find a job.. been in and out of jail because he's TOO LAZY to do his community service.. he puts his hands on her and everything that they do is on her expense. she pays for everything for him.. from his monthly credit card bills to putting gas in his car. it's been 5 years already!!! it's just bothering me to see my close friend getting taken advance of.. and the fact that he put his hands on her makes me scared.. i told her about my concern and she got mad at me for 'butting in'. what should i do? just stay out of it?
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  #2  
Old March 16th, 2010, 04:11 PM
Nicollette Nicollette is offline
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i understand your concern.. and it's sad that your friend is soo much in a dazy and doesn't even realize that you're just worried about her. it's good that you attempted and let her know how you feel about her relationship with her boyfriend. maybe it would at least get her to question her relationship since someone is telling her something is obviously wrong.. i wish her good luck!
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  #3  
Old March 17th, 2010, 11:05 AM
Eva Eva is offline
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I think you did a good job as her friend to confront her with your concern rather than staying quiet. But you should understand that she's at a very volunarable point right now so you shouldn't push her to hard because you might end up pushing her away. What you should do is just kinda build her up when he puts her down and be there for her constantly...even if its at 3 in the morning...
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  #4  
Old March 17th, 2010, 04:02 PM
Mabel Miller Mabel Miller is offline
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if i know one thing its hard to let go fo someone you really love and care for.. which is why after my last relationship which was completely unhealthy.. i realized something.. that as hard as it was and as alone as i felt for a few weeks. imbetter off now.. sometines you need to forget what you feel and remember what you deserve..

you friend has to realizeds that .. and it would piss me off too to see someone treating my freind like that hes basically a dead beat and sooner or later hes probably gonna get her pregnant. just saying soo yeah she need to realize it.. but be careful hopw you act around her .. like someone said.. you might just push her away.
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  #5  
Old March 17th, 2010, 05:22 PM
Ellen Sanchez Ellen Sanchez is offline
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i recently went thorugh this with a freind where her guy gave her a fat lip and yeah we hangout with a bunch of guys needless to say they allwanted to beat him down.. so yeah espeically if he has angery issues.. she should be careful becasue if he does it once hes just going to keep doing it and she has to to know its not alright.
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  #6  
Old March 19th, 2010, 12:16 PM
Skylar Newton Skylar Newton is offline
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wow that can be really hard if your friend dosent really want any help and if she afeels that she truly loves him that nothing is going to change.. and he might be abusive to her and that is why she is telling you to keep to your self because if he was to find out things couldbe worse for her. i really wish that guys wouldnt be so mean and i hope that guys wouldnt hit their gf's and same with girls hitting their boyfriends..
My brother in law and his on again off again girlfriend actually get into physical fights. breaking lamps over eachothers heads.. socking each other.. ( in the face sometimes) ugh its just toally crazy how bad soem things have gotten!
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  #7  
Old March 20th, 2010, 03:18 PM
Philomena Wicker Philomena Wicker is offline
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I think that unless things start to go really bad...like to the point of physical abuse and threatening her with violence, there is nothing you can really do for her except to keep telling her or offering her advice. Honestly, she is putting herself in this situation, and while you can get involved, it is ultimately up to her. Unfortunately, all he is doing is just being a lazy oaf., and I don't thinkthere is any threat of violence against her, juist potentiually some inappropriate grabbing. Keep trying to get her to understand, but this is her own fault for allowing herself to support this guy.
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  #8  
Old March 22nd, 2010, 03:10 PM
Maria Frances Maria Frances is offline
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I would say lay low and just be a supportive friend. You have to understand that all the things that are probably running through your mind are semi running through hers she's just in denial about it all. So when she comes crying to you be there every single time and when you're giving her a pep talk like instill in her that she deserves and can do better! Don't force anything on her because you might end up pushing her away....maybe even introduce her to other guys who you know would treat her right...that worked with my cousin. It helped that the guy me nd my brother introduced her too was really into her...so he chased her and showed her hands down how a real man treats his woman!
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  #9  
Old March 26th, 2010, 01:57 PM
Marcy Clark Marcy Clark is offline
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like my mom says love is blind and you cant tell the person about all the bad things tht are happening because they really wont pay attention to them they usually think your just trying to break up this relationship that they have and that there is such good shape when in reality they could be going down hill really fast and could be in a dangrous situation. i would really hate for someone to become hurt being in a relationship where their boyfriend used them and took advantage of how nice som people are.. its reallly really sad
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  #10  
Old April 23rd, 2010, 12:23 PM
Linette Linette is offline
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wow thats really sad that your friend is still just sitting here letting this happen to her.. i have a friend kinda near the same situation and i have sat her down a few times and had a few heart to hearts with her and she started to take more notes and now i catch her standing up for her self and its a big step to see her stand up for her self. im very proud of her.
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